Of Kisses, of Sexual Predators, Of Chijioke Amu-Nnadi

Mine didn’t start with poetry.

I didn’t know him beyond his name, his posts, on Facebook.

I was in Uganda for 2015 Writivism Literary Festival as the festival’s blog editor; he was there too, as a guest to hold a masterclass on poetry.

He checked in at midnight with Sadiq Dzukogi. I was working at a section of Ministers’ Village –the hotel we were lodged- dining hall when he arrived. Mukoma wa Thiong’o, Pa Ikhide, and Aaron Bady had arrived not long before and I’d gone to the reception to greet them so when Ssekandi – the festival’s official chauffeur – pulled into the driveway, I went out to see who else had come in.

As I greeted him and introduced myself, he hugged me. Then one of the minders and I accompanied them upstairs to settle in. After we found their rooms, we all made to leave. I was going back to the ground floor to continue work; he offered to see me off a bit. When we got to the first floor (his room was on the third), we stopped to wrap up our chit chat. I didn’t see what happened next coming. It just did.

He cupped my face in his hands and kissed me.

I didn’t know what to do. I wasn’t even processing. I just said, “Goodnight,” turned around and walked back to where I was working. As I sat, it began to hit me. Chijioke-Amunnadi kissed me. He kissed me…he…kissed me? He fucking kissed me?

Irritation. Anger.

This was the man I had never interacted with personally, not even on Facebook. We had just met and he’d kissed me. I didn’t even know him! As I processed, I began to calm myself. I had work to do, Bwesigye Bwa Mwesigire and the Writivism team did not bring me to Uganda so I could spend time sorting feelings at Ministers’ Village hotel. As I continued working, he came downstairs to give me an autographed copy of his book. I thanked him and kept working.

The next days at Uganda found me avoiding him and getting irritated when he tried to come close or call me daughter. My roommate, Nneoma, knew my irritation for the man.

One night, he asked us to move into his room which was bigger than ours so he could move into ours, because a “friend” had come in and needed somewhere to stay. I disagreed but Nneoma calmed me and said it was just for the night. When we got to his room, he looked around and said it was big enough and we all could share. We disagreed.

Adeola would later see the massive doze of ‘attitude’ I dished him regularly. And even the night she and Nneoma asked me to go with them for a dinner that Chijioke ended paying for, I had mental workings to do and ensured nothing drew he and I close.
I have heard things.

I don’t know Chijioke. I don’t know him at all.

Perhaps kissing me – without so much as a simple by-your-leave, may not count much in the scope of all that’s been blowing up for days but I heard the old man has been saying the girls he tried things with seduced him, they were cheap…I hope he hasn’t mentioned my name because the result will take the host of heaven to settle. My blood is that hot.

There are a few more things to say about my encounter with this man.

I hosted a project on 10 October 2015 for World Mental Health Day at University of Ibadan, Nigeria. Some of you may know about it. The Curator of the project invited Chijioke to perform as we were interpreting mental health issues through art. I had given the Curator sole right to decide on who got invited, so I chose to let things slide.

In the course of planning, we ran short of funds and she turned to Chijioke for help. He did. She was one of his “daughters” but as I’ll later discover, one of the few “daughters” he hadn’t tried to touch… Yet.

He gave a total of about 35,000 naira towards the event. I thanked him. And I kept him far.

But the old man still did not know his place and went on to attempt something with our Welfare Coordinator. He wanted to kiss her; he wanted to give her head. I wasn’t there when he said those things but she came back from performing her official duties and told me this.

It is important to mention the money part because I heard he said these girls – the ones he’s tried things with – were after his money.

Dem too love money.

– Mary Ajayi


  1. tessadoghor says:

    I bet he didn’t think you would speak.

    Watch your back though. I saw his apology on Facebook. I didn’t know what he was apologising for. I googled his name, it yielded nothing. Then I googled his name, put a comma and then put girls next to it, I saw your blog and came here.

    I can get it. What he did was sexual assault. Unfortunately Nigeria does not have the awareness or laws to deal with this.

    He calls the girls ‘daughters’ abi. I am a citizen of heaven located physically on earth. On the part of the earth where my parents came from, you don’t kiss your daughters on the mouth. Especially when they are older, it is not an African thing, kissing on the mouth, that is.


  2. Confused. Liking this seems rather ironical since it’s not an experience to like.


  3. Yasky says:

    From all the stories, you can see the trend. Psychopaths are highly intelligent people with a fault somewhere. They usually keep the fault hidden using precision in timing, selecting prey, and honed skill in methods. Sad to say, but this news doesn’t come as a surprise.

    What I would beg you is this: gather more victims, as many as you can find. Let them narrate their story. Then draw similarities. From there, you can know what makes this man tick. And you could even be able to predict the kiss (or whatever) from his first glance. I am interested in seeing the outcome of this. So what do you say? Are you up for the title “prophetess”? [ – :

    A psychopath is an awesome phenomenon to observe; one of nature’s many beauties. But their “omni-complex” usually blinds them from realizing they could be codified with simple scientific methods. And the adherence to routine, albeit deepening knowledge in one thing, is detrimental in the end; because the only “way out” is to climb out of the tunnel of deep knowledge.

    And so on and so on… I could go on for minutes on this comment but I haven’t had dinner :p


    1. 9jafeminista says:

      But we don’t have a degree in psychiatry it would be wrong to diagnose people


      1. Yasky says:

        If artists waited for the title to pick up a pencil, art would be but a figment of our imagination.

        But you’re right though. A diagnosis is done by titular officers in an attempt to heal a condition or situation.

        This isn’t a diagnosis as much as its a hypothesis leading to a theory. This is a plight to understand. This… is for knowledge.


      2. 9jafeminista says:

        We’d be happy to feature your article if you’d write it.


  4. ASA says:

    Blame modern literary art for the dullness of moral sensors. Modern writers and artistes believe you must break moral restrictions and be shorn of decency to be acceptable in the cult of story tellers. The festivals and project forums reek of deviations as writers break all cords of ethics and set no morsl boundaries and protocols.There are so many Chijiokes out there aiming to shape this world while shorn of discretion and decency. Pray they are soon found and finished before they ruin the noble trades.


    1. 9jafeminista says:

      To be candid your post makes no sense, so we’re to blame the inanimate for human errors and absolve people for choices that has nothing to do with trying to fit in or “deviant” behaviour or what? Chijioke’s behaviour is no different from that of a lot of men in our society being protected by the patriarchy.


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